Thursday, May 1, 2008

May 1, 2008

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)


A Baptist pastor wrote, "O.K., I'm tired of hearing about how no one has stepped up with the 12Gs. Here they are: GGGGGGGGGGGG."


I love to laugh as much as Ed Wynn in Mary Poppins.

I can laugh at myself; and appreciate everyone who keeps writing to say I'm a laughing-stock.

But I'm still not kidding about the 12Gs.


"Just a spoonful of sugar" does help the medicine go down.

I tell preaching students, "Humor loosens 'em up. That's when you can stick in the knife of truth and twist it before they know what hit 'em."

I use humor as a rhetorical preface to deeper concerns, conundrums, conclusions, and anything else beginning with c.

Here are some lines from Reinhold Niebuhr's Discerning the Signs of the Times (1946) about humor as a sugar-coated way of addressing life's sour realities:

Humor is concerned with the immediate
incongruities of life and faith with the ultimate
ones...Laughter is our reaction to immediate
incongruities...Laughter is a sane and
healthful response to the innocent foibles
of men; and even to some which are not
innocent...We also prove by the laughter
that we do not take the annoyance too
seriously...People with a sense of humor
do not take themselves too seriously...All
of us ought to be ready to laugh at ourselves
because all of us are a little funny in our
foibles, conceits, and pretensions...The
ability to laugh at oneself is the prelude
to the sense of contrition. Laughter is a
vestibule to the temple of confession.

I couldn't have said it better.

That's why I didn't try.

No joke.


Speaking of jokes, BHO's pastor disaster is off the charts.

Whenever he speaks, HRC, JM, and racists of all colors just laugh and laugh and laugh and...

Of course, BHO doesn't think he's funny; because JW is doing more damage to his Presidential ambitions than Islam to world peace.


I like BHO.

Parenthetically, I'm kinda warming up to HRC too; especially since her cameos on the Factor.

And that JM, despite hints of short man's disease, is a cute little fellah; and he kinda reminds of that Kerry guy who married into lots of $.

By the way, if you're not praying to like 'em and if you're not praying His best for 'em, you may want to check out those texts about the measure extended by you being the measure that will be extended back at ya by, uh, Him.


Liking and voting don't necessarily go together.

It's like listening and agreeing.


I sent a letter to the highest judicial officer of my ecclesiastical franchise:

Dear Cliff,

As you move to the end of your tenure as
Stated Clerk of the PCUSA, I want to thank
you for always being cordial in our personal
correspondence even when I have asked
tough questions and offered salty

Though some of your friends on the left
and some of mine on the right don't get
it, our fledgling friendship has proven it
is possible as well as commanded to
retain communion through Jesus.

As we wonder about the way to San
Jose (bad joke), I am hoping Jeremiah
Wright will not be asked to speak to our
General Assembly, paradenominationals,
committees, or any other organization
related to our biennial shindig (San Jose,
6/21-28, 2008); and I am praying you will
dissuade anyone thinking about it.

Certainly, I do not need to catalogue my
many concerns; however, I will highlight

I have read JW's sermons, read transcripts
and watched most of his television self-
promotionals, and listened to more
exegesis of his ideologies than seems

Continuing to spend a good deal of time in
our wonderful African-American culture, I
know many of his concerns are emotionally
plausible if not intellectually preposterous
while being imperceptible to our Euro-
American culture.

Be that as it is regardless of the Euro-
American protests, his GD language crosses
the border of blasphemy according to the
witness of Jesus as attested in the New
Testament (e.g., John 3, 1 Timothy 2).

I have urged him through a mutual friend to
confess that sin, repent, and be restored
to the whole family of faith.

While I may be wrong, I believe inviting him,
as a fellow mainliner (UCC), to speak to
our franchise in any official capacity will
cause unnecessary confusion and contention.

It would also be a rather sad way to end
your tenure.

I will be making this letter public; because
I want to be held accountable for my
concern and I want you to be held
accountable for your discretion is this

Blessings and Love!

No joke.


An ecclesiastical bureaucrat in Iowa asked if I knew anything was in the works to have JW speak to our franchise in San Jose; or if I was being just, uh, pre-emptive.

Candidly, I thought I was being pre-emptive; until I heard some PCUSAers are already rallying around him (go to the 5/1/08 edition of

I wrote the letter to Cliff on 4/30/08.


Actually, I was chastised for even suggesting anybody would invite him to our GA meeting.

So I started singing, "Anybody here seen my old friend...Norman...Angela...Chris...Janie...Janet...John...Douglas...?"

History does have a way of repeating itself it there's been no confession or repentance.


I spoke at the Mayor's Annual Prayer Breakfast this morning (Belvidere, Illinois).

My favorite mayor asked everyone to turn off tape, camera, wristwatch, and other recorders.

Thanks, JW!

Be that as it's gonna be until his 15 minutes expire, the next section is a summary of what I said.


Blessings on you!

God bless America!

And thank you for the privilege to pray with you, "Long may our land be bright with freedom's holy light. Protect us by Thy might, great God, our King!"

Considering the threats to our country and children from the darkening clouds of this modern world's meanness, madness, and misery, I am praising our Lord for His call through our faithful Mayor and friend to come together and cross over our denominational divisions which cause so much pain for Him and forfeit so many promises through unity - "How good and pleasant it is when God's children live together in unity!" (see Psalm 133) - and beg the Lord's continued blessings upon America and call America to renewed blessings upon Him.

There are so many challenges before us; requiring His direct intervention and inspiration of the faithful to work together in concert as profiled in Jesus and prescribed in Holy Scripture.

By the way, I know this is a breakfast meeting and folks have to get to work; so I promised our Mayor that I would not exceed 45 or 50 minutes.

Just kidding.

A favorite limerick sums up our present predicament and precarious habitat:

God's plan had a hopeful beginning;
but man ruined his chances by sinning.
We trust that the story
will end in God's glory.
But, at present, the other side's winning.

I like a good laugh; especially in these days filled with so many tears.

And one of my favorite funnies is about the preacher whose son sat as his daddy ministered to two congregants confessing conflicting worldviews.

As a pro-lifer made her case, the daddy-preacher kept saying, "You're right!"

Then a pro-choicer came in after the pro-lifer left; and as she made her case, the daddy-preacher kept saying, "You're right!"

After both were gone, the boy said to his daddy, "They both can't be right!"

And the daddy-preacher said, "You're right!"


Our Lord promises to keep answering our prayers for America as we return His favors with increasing fidelities: "If my people who are called by My Name humble themselves, pray and seek My face, and turn from their evil ways, then I will hear from heaven, forgive their sin, and heal their land" (2 Chronicles 7:14).

Unless you're the kind of person who thinks an elephant is a mouse with glandular problems or has overdosed on St. John's Wort making Pollyanna look like a cynic, you know our country and children are at risk from very, very, very dark conspiracies being birthed by Satan itself with too many unwitting as well as willing accomplices.

And if you're like me, you find yourself praying more and more and more, "Come, Lord Jesus!"

There are too many days when I really, really, really relate to the lament of John Coffey in The Green Mile not long before his execution for a crime which he did not commit, "I know you been worryin, but you ought to quit on it now. Because I want to go...I'm rightly tired of the pain I hear and feel...I'm tired of people bein ugly to each other. It feels like pieces of glass in my head. I'm tired of all the times I've wanted to help and couldn't...Mostly it's the pain...There's too much. If I could end it, I would. But I can't."

Oh, yes, come, Lord Jesus!

In this meantime, let us pray.

Let us pray with the apostle, "Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God" (see Romans 12).

Yes, let us look up, stand up, speak up, and act up for Jesus who always invites, welcomes, includes, and, when He is Lord of all by acclaim, affection, and allegiance, all are better for Him.

Yes, let us pray, "Long may our land be bright with freedom's holy light. Protect us by Thy might, great God, our King!"

Blessings on you!

God bless America!


Much of what JW says is emotionally plausible even if intellectually preposterous while being imperceptible to Euro-Americans.

But some things are even more black and white than he'd care to admit right now.

He has hurt BHO's chances to become the next resident in the, uh, White House.

He has increased the chances of HRC and JM by fueling racial fears, prejudices, and hatreds.

He is bringing our melting pot to a boil.

And it's going to take more than 12Gs to get him to shut up.

Speaking of 12Gs,...


With our world and church going to hell quicker than poop through a goose, I have concluded the only things that matter anymore are faith, family, and friends.

And there comes a time when blaming poor potty training for bad behavior is as dishonest as blaming France for Iraq and escargot and Britney Spears for girls gone wild.

And blaming BHO for JW or JW for BHO or whatever some folks are trying to do to link the loon with the increasingly distinguished junior Senator is as incredulous as blaming Jesus for some Christians who need more Jesus so Jesus doesn't get blamed for more Christians with some but not very much Jesus.

Or something like that.

No joke.


Blessings and Love!

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