Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)
@#$%
You may have heard about the mainline cleric who said to a pro-lifer, "You're right!"
After the pro-lifer was out of sight and sound, she/he said to a pro-choicer (euphemism), "You're right!"
God thundered from the heavens at the cleric, "They can't both be right!"
The mainliner shouted back, "You're right!"
@#$%
I thought JM and BHO are running for President; but Democrats talk more about GWB than JM and Republicans talk more about WJC than BHO.
Everybody's talking about SP!!!
Maybe it's because she is the only one who has clear convictions coupled with a consistent record of public service.
@#$%
Can you reimagine what BHO and his buddies at ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, ESPN, NYT, WP, RRS, WR, CV, CT, CST, PCUSA, et. al. would say if JM made a synonymous kinda slur about MO akin to his ditty on SP: "You can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig!"?
I used to say/think/hope BHO isn't as nutty as his buddies.
Oh, yeah, I forgot, he wasn't talking about SP.
Yeah, right!
Anyone who swallows those spins thinks an elephant is a mouse with glandular problems or is still smoking weed with Jimi and Janis playing in the background.
Isn't it amazing/frustrating/infuriating/bewildering/hallucinating to watch Democrats and Republicans lionize their own and demonize all others?
Of course, who said honesty has anything to do with politics?
It's like two women at a graveside. One says, "Well, here lies _____: a politician and an honest man." The other cries, "Isn't it awful how they buried both of them in one grave."
@#$%
A studious fellah from Kansas City paraphrased the piggy comments of SP and BHO in a way that included ethnic slurs directed at BHO; which I will not quote because I'm not into ethnic jokes as a matter of, uh, Christian ethics.
Anyway, he wrote, "Do you think the comment I just made would elicit a claim of racism from the BHO campaign? I'm no prophet nor mind-reader, but as a hack writer, I have to think it was at least a mistake on BHO's part to grab part of the most notable analogy SP used in her acceptance speech, and re-use it in the way he did, without considering the way it would reflect on her personally. Ivy League academic pedigrees are no insurance against occasional cerebral flatulence...My gut feeling is that this was an effort to 'rapidly respond' to SP's analogy, and blunt its effect by grabbing it and trying to attach a new, less-pleasant evocation. A good campaign consultant would probably look at this and wince."
O.K.
I talked with one of my favorite congregants who really, really, really likes BHO because he makes her/him feel good when he talks even though she/he admits he doesn't really say much while sounding so good; and she/he thinks he meant no disrespect to SP while invoking pigs.
O.K.
But you can't have it both ways.
If he meant it, it's disgusting and betrays character not worthy of the White House.
If he didn't mean it, it means he's not very thoughtful in using analogies/metaphors that are as highly charged to women as some words are to ethnic groups.
O.K.
Roll those dice!
@#$%
Speaking of wincing, I saw a guy who left our family of faith not long after I arrived about three years ago because, uh, he hates me in a Christian kind of way because I kinda, uh, allowed him to expose himself and watched from the sideline.
Robustly, I called out his name, shook his hand, and smiled at him; genuinely happy to see him and hoping he'd gotten over me and, uh, himself.
He couldn't look me in the eyes, pulled his hand back as quickly as possible, and made a condescending grunt.
O.K.
He hates me.
Aside from dad always cautioning me about people who can't look you in the eyes which usually betrays they're ashamed of something or hiding some really bad stuff or just don't like you and tell as many others about it as possible, I am always saddened by folks who put up a false front of soft-spoken charity as long as they're in emotional, intellectual, and spiritual lockstep with you.
O.K.
Some people don't get that part about loving Jesus by loving like Jesus which includes graciousness even when you don't like 'em.
Like Democrats and Republicans who demand from others what we can't expect from them - things like, uh, honesty - you can't blame Jesus for some Christians who need some more Jesus in their lives.
@#$%
BHO is the most vacuously eloquent of the four.
JM is almost as boring as AG.
JB and SP are more fun and fast on their feet.
BHO is the best orator with a prepared script.
JM is boring, uh, no matter what.
JB and SP are more fun and fast on their feet.
BHO is always gonna sound better than JM in the prepared speech department.
JM is boring but still does better than BHO without a script; which means BHO better be careful when the debates start; though his opening and closing remarks will say nothing but say it so beautifully and persuasively that his fans will be drooling with affection and rekindled allegiance and wondering how anyone could consider voting for GWB, uh, JM.
Actually, most folks would rather watch JB and SP than JM and BHO at this point.
JB and SP are more fun and fast on their feet.
But that's just my, uh, opinion.
I may be wrong.
@#$%
Mainline clergy have a terrible habit of agreeing with the last person they've talked to, ending clauses and sentences with prepositions, and wondering why nobody takes them seriously anymore.
Hint.
People they've talked to last end up talking to each other.
"You're right!"
Wrong.
@#$%
Saying what you really think/believe saves time and memory.
Maybe I'm just gettin' older but I can't remember lies as well as the truth; and I've got to make up new lies to cover up for old lies and...
Truth never changes; or at least truth as you believe it.
If you keep your story straight regardless of the audience, people will trust you even if they don't like you; which is why people who don't like me or even hate me trust me more than the guy who I talked about earlier in this KD who eveeeeeeeeerrrrrrryyyyyybooooooodddddyyyy likes but don't trust.
@#$%
People ask why I don't list KD recipients or cite sources.
If I list recipients, SPAMMERS pick up their addresses and start sending so many ED ads to 'em that they grow self-conscious; and, besides, lots of KD subscribers are like folks who read The Layman and watch porn and don't want to get caught.
If I cited sources, I wouldn't be able to tell you what's happening in those deep and dark corners where folks think they're meeting in secret to scheme stuff which is so antithetical to Jesus as attested in Holy Scripture; for people who squeal on 'em to me know they'd get, uh, screwed in a Christian kind of way if they exposed 'em (see, uh, again, John 3:19-21).
But, dang, you'd be surprised to see a list of my subscribers and sources.
I'm surprised.
@#$%
Speaking of speaking out of both sides of your mouth, middle of the road mainliners better watch out!
Members of their congregations are writing to me; but while I'd never talk about anybody by name, folks are starting to talk in their congregations.
Hint.
Walking down the middle of the road means you're gonna get hit by both sides sooner than later.
"You're right!"
Wrong.
@#$%
Didn't Jesus say something about that?
@#$%
As readers of Cave Canem will discover - those who read Fifteen Secrets already know but they're less than the attendance at a regular season White Sox game - I'm trying to move more and more and more into the light; because I grow very dim very quickly apart from, uh, light.
@#$%
A subscriber wrote to an editor: "I have missed seeing _____'s stuff in popular print. I realize he's not everyone's favorite writer, but _____s are rarely popular with the faithless masses and self-perpetuating and self-righteous mainline membership, bureaucracies, and establishment. However, I believe people want to hear what he has to say. Many resonate with his thoughts even though they are afraid to say what he says. The powers-that-be continue to use their offices to intimidate and silence those who speak against their ways and wiles. My desire is that you or somebody else musters up the guts to counter their strong-arm intimidations by giving voice to others like him."
A member of another mainline franchise wrote, "I've been a Methodist all of my life; and I've never seen such disarray. Our DS has given us three pastors in a row who don't know Jesus from Jack or the Bible from The Prophet. I sense so much pain beneath your humor. I want you to know it's just as bad in our denomination; or, as you say, franchise. You must have a great congregation to put up with you."
Somebody who hates me like the guy mentioned earlier scolded, "Face it! You evangelicals have lost! We're going to take your property, money, and do to you what we did to Kenyon long ago! You can _____ and ______ all you want to! You're gone!"
O.K.
Fortunately, Jesus wins in the end.
Uh, come, Lord Jesus!
@#$%
And, yes, I am privileged to be the pastor of a faithful congregation in a faithful presbytery so far.
I love them and they kinda love me; but, most important, we love Jesus.
It's all about the, uh, election.
@#$%
Blessings and Love!
(John 3:19-21)
@#$%
You may have heard about the mainline cleric who said to a pro-lifer, "You're right!"
After the pro-lifer was out of sight and sound, she/he said to a pro-choicer (euphemism), "You're right!"
God thundered from the heavens at the cleric, "They can't both be right!"
The mainliner shouted back, "You're right!"
@#$%
I thought JM and BHO are running for President; but Democrats talk more about GWB than JM and Republicans talk more about WJC than BHO.
Everybody's talking about SP!!!
Maybe it's because she is the only one who has clear convictions coupled with a consistent record of public service.
@#$%
Can you reimagine what BHO and his buddies at ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, ESPN, NYT, WP, RRS, WR, CV, CT, CST, PCUSA, et. al. would say if JM made a synonymous kinda slur about MO akin to his ditty on SP: "You can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig!"?
I used to say/think/hope BHO isn't as nutty as his buddies.
Oh, yeah, I forgot, he wasn't talking about SP.
Yeah, right!
Anyone who swallows those spins thinks an elephant is a mouse with glandular problems or is still smoking weed with Jimi and Janis playing in the background.
Isn't it amazing/frustrating/infuriating/bewildering/hallucinating to watch Democrats and Republicans lionize their own and demonize all others?
Of course, who said honesty has anything to do with politics?
It's like two women at a graveside. One says, "Well, here lies _____: a politician and an honest man." The other cries, "Isn't it awful how they buried both of them in one grave."
@#$%
A studious fellah from Kansas City paraphrased the piggy comments of SP and BHO in a way that included ethnic slurs directed at BHO; which I will not quote because I'm not into ethnic jokes as a matter of, uh, Christian ethics.
Anyway, he wrote, "Do you think the comment I just made would elicit a claim of racism from the BHO campaign? I'm no prophet nor mind-reader, but as a hack writer, I have to think it was at least a mistake on BHO's part to grab part of the most notable analogy SP used in her acceptance speech, and re-use it in the way he did, without considering the way it would reflect on her personally. Ivy League academic pedigrees are no insurance against occasional cerebral flatulence...My gut feeling is that this was an effort to 'rapidly respond' to SP's analogy, and blunt its effect by grabbing it and trying to attach a new, less-pleasant evocation. A good campaign consultant would probably look at this and wince."
O.K.
I talked with one of my favorite congregants who really, really, really likes BHO because he makes her/him feel good when he talks even though she/he admits he doesn't really say much while sounding so good; and she/he thinks he meant no disrespect to SP while invoking pigs.
O.K.
But you can't have it both ways.
If he meant it, it's disgusting and betrays character not worthy of the White House.
If he didn't mean it, it means he's not very thoughtful in using analogies/metaphors that are as highly charged to women as some words are to ethnic groups.
O.K.
Roll those dice!
@#$%
Speaking of wincing, I saw a guy who left our family of faith not long after I arrived about three years ago because, uh, he hates me in a Christian kind of way because I kinda, uh, allowed him to expose himself and watched from the sideline.
Robustly, I called out his name, shook his hand, and smiled at him; genuinely happy to see him and hoping he'd gotten over me and, uh, himself.
He couldn't look me in the eyes, pulled his hand back as quickly as possible, and made a condescending grunt.
O.K.
He hates me.
Aside from dad always cautioning me about people who can't look you in the eyes which usually betrays they're ashamed of something or hiding some really bad stuff or just don't like you and tell as many others about it as possible, I am always saddened by folks who put up a false front of soft-spoken charity as long as they're in emotional, intellectual, and spiritual lockstep with you.
O.K.
Some people don't get that part about loving Jesus by loving like Jesus which includes graciousness even when you don't like 'em.
Like Democrats and Republicans who demand from others what we can't expect from them - things like, uh, honesty - you can't blame Jesus for some Christians who need some more Jesus in their lives.
@#$%
BHO is the most vacuously eloquent of the four.
JM is almost as boring as AG.
JB and SP are more fun and fast on their feet.
BHO is the best orator with a prepared script.
JM is boring, uh, no matter what.
JB and SP are more fun and fast on their feet.
BHO is always gonna sound better than JM in the prepared speech department.
JM is boring but still does better than BHO without a script; which means BHO better be careful when the debates start; though his opening and closing remarks will say nothing but say it so beautifully and persuasively that his fans will be drooling with affection and rekindled allegiance and wondering how anyone could consider voting for GWB, uh, JM.
Actually, most folks would rather watch JB and SP than JM and BHO at this point.
JB and SP are more fun and fast on their feet.
But that's just my, uh, opinion.
I may be wrong.
@#$%
Mainline clergy have a terrible habit of agreeing with the last person they've talked to, ending clauses and sentences with prepositions, and wondering why nobody takes them seriously anymore.
Hint.
People they've talked to last end up talking to each other.
"You're right!"
Wrong.
@#$%
Saying what you really think/believe saves time and memory.
Maybe I'm just gettin' older but I can't remember lies as well as the truth; and I've got to make up new lies to cover up for old lies and...
Truth never changes; or at least truth as you believe it.
If you keep your story straight regardless of the audience, people will trust you even if they don't like you; which is why people who don't like me or even hate me trust me more than the guy who I talked about earlier in this KD who eveeeeeeeeerrrrrrryyyyyybooooooodddddyyyy likes but don't trust.
@#$%
People ask why I don't list KD recipients or cite sources.
If I list recipients, SPAMMERS pick up their addresses and start sending so many ED ads to 'em that they grow self-conscious; and, besides, lots of KD subscribers are like folks who read The Layman and watch porn and don't want to get caught.
If I cited sources, I wouldn't be able to tell you what's happening in those deep and dark corners where folks think they're meeting in secret to scheme stuff which is so antithetical to Jesus as attested in Holy Scripture; for people who squeal on 'em to me know they'd get, uh, screwed in a Christian kind of way if they exposed 'em (see, uh, again, John 3:19-21).
But, dang, you'd be surprised to see a list of my subscribers and sources.
I'm surprised.
@#$%
Speaking of speaking out of both sides of your mouth, middle of the road mainliners better watch out!
Members of their congregations are writing to me; but while I'd never talk about anybody by name, folks are starting to talk in their congregations.
Hint.
Walking down the middle of the road means you're gonna get hit by both sides sooner than later.
"You're right!"
Wrong.
@#$%
Didn't Jesus say something about that?
@#$%
As readers of Cave Canem will discover - those who read Fifteen Secrets already know but they're less than the attendance at a regular season White Sox game - I'm trying to move more and more and more into the light; because I grow very dim very quickly apart from, uh, light.
@#$%
A subscriber wrote to an editor: "I have missed seeing _____'s stuff in popular print. I realize he's not everyone's favorite writer, but _____s are rarely popular with the faithless masses and self-perpetuating and self-righteous mainline membership, bureaucracies, and establishment. However, I believe people want to hear what he has to say. Many resonate with his thoughts even though they are afraid to say what he says. The powers-that-be continue to use their offices to intimidate and silence those who speak against their ways and wiles. My desire is that you or somebody else musters up the guts to counter their strong-arm intimidations by giving voice to others like him."
A member of another mainline franchise wrote, "I've been a Methodist all of my life; and I've never seen such disarray. Our DS has given us three pastors in a row who don't know Jesus from Jack or the Bible from The Prophet. I sense so much pain beneath your humor. I want you to know it's just as bad in our denomination; or, as you say, franchise. You must have a great congregation to put up with you."
Somebody who hates me like the guy mentioned earlier scolded, "Face it! You evangelicals have lost! We're going to take your property, money, and do to you what we did to Kenyon long ago! You can _____ and ______ all you want to! You're gone!"
O.K.
Fortunately, Jesus wins in the end.
Uh, come, Lord Jesus!
@#$%
And, yes, I am privileged to be the pastor of a faithful congregation in a faithful presbytery so far.
I love them and they kinda love me; but, most important, we love Jesus.
It's all about the, uh, election.
@#$%
Blessings and Love!
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