Friday, December 5, 2008

December 3, 2008

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)


Front Bumper:


"Howard and Kopp with Real People" almost made it to national broadcasting.

Google it or read about it in Fifteen Secrets for Life and Ministry.

Anyway, Rus let me pick the bumper music; and if a local/national radio station - not into TV anymore because of what my mom just said which you'll get to later - is persuaded by Kathie or you, you'll hear 'em again (not tellin' now because I don't feel like tellin').

Today's front and back bumpers have more to do with my recent, uh, trip.

If I have to explain it to you after you read this KD, it proves, uh, something.


Have you ever seen the comic with the two women looking at a man with frazzled hair and bugged-out eyes who is totally paralyzed while sitting in front of his desktop with motionless hands on the keys?

One says to the other, "The power went out about three hours ago, his computer malfunctioned, and he lost ten years of research on his next book."

Nothing as bad as that happened to me; but the power went out at the church around 4:30 p.m. (yesterday) for about 30 seconds and I lost a KD on Outlook Express with no hope of recovery.

I also lost a sermon.

I believe in providence.


I knew yesterday was going to be awful.

Here's a clue.

Have you ever read Judith Viorst's Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day?

Empathy comes to mind.


I got back late Monday night after two days of air travel for two days in Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania to celebrate my dad's 80th at a surprise birthday party and roast.

My time with mom, dad, sister, brother-in-law, nephew, niece, and invited guests was among the most positively emotional moments of my life; and I'll be processing it all for a while.

Chances are you'll hear about it.

The flights were, uh, a trip.


I left for WB on Friday after Thursday/Thanksgiving.

Continental was the carrier; and it was a fine flight with a courteous crew.

Have you noticed how much older stewardesses are these days?

What's up with that?

We arrived on time.

The only problem was inhaling sweet smelling toxic fumes after de-icing for about 30 minutes of the 60 minutes in flight; and I've been sneezing every hour on the hour ever since along with hallucinating that PBHO's Cabinet looks more like the same old same old than ch-ch-ch-changes.

Kathie, I think we've got our first national advertiser!

Or maybe we'll just wait for one of our litigiously-vocationed subscribers to call for us.


My parents drink decaffeinated coffee.

I don't.

So I walked about two blocks to Dunkin' Donuts on Saturday morning and was greeted by one of my favorite "headers" instead of the typical elevator music:

I said to the young cashier, "I listened to that while cruisin' this neighborhood before you were born."

The older yet younger than yours truly manager in overhearing distance mouthed, "I kinda remember it, but can't really place it."

I prompted, "I'm sure you remember Ginger Baker, Jack Bruce, and, of course, Eric Clapton."

She mused, "Oh, I thought they were country."

And that's why I have never needed acid to take, uh, a trip.


I went to Dunkin' Donuts with my parents on Monday morning before heading to the airport.

My mom said, "Bobby, you look so good. Maybe a little heavy. But you look so good."

When dad asked if I wanted a donut, I declined.

Go back to the first section.


Charlie Weis comes to mind.

He was a great assistant/associate coach in the NFL before going to Notre Dame; mentored by Bill Parcells and enabling Belicheat to win three Super Bowl rings.

Proving there's a fundamental vocational difference (beruf) between assistant/associate and senior/head coaches - Do you see any parallels? - he's been pret' near a disaster since his first two years when he won lots more games with players who were recruited by his predecessor who was fired after only three seasons with a comparable record.


Weis is white.

Willingham isn't.

If their records are comparable, why are folks saying Weis will live out his contract for at least another year but...?

C'mon, didn't Election 2008 prove that...?

Pat Forde of "It's very simple. If Willingham had to go after three seasons, Weis has to go with a worse record after four. Or the explanation for keeping him had better be brilliant."


The flight back was delayed several hours.

I lost count.

My car was covered with about an inch of ice at remote parking; but that Caliber which I can now buy for less than I still owe started up like a Cub Scout in heat.

I got home in time to kiss everybody good night.


I went to the church, as is my obsession, very early on Tuesday.

Everything was normal.

The heating system related to my study is still on amphetamines; meaning it's warm enough for those hairless dogs which Peru has offered PBHO's daughters even with all of my windows open and fan running at max to circulate freezing air from the outside to the inside.

Fortunately, our family of faith is rollin' in $ and doesn't have to worry about wasting so much $ on a heating system dating back to the annunciation.


I spent all day squeezing in some sentences for KD between meetings, administrative headaches, visiting a shut-in at the beauty parlor, going to the hospital, outlining Sunday's homiletical offering, and wondering if I will ride a chrome pony before the parousia.

I picked up my youngest son from chess club, went home to scrape off the ice from the driveway which was snow the night before while I was flying home which could have been cleared so easily by the snowblower which I taught everybody how to use on the Wednesday before Thursday/Thanksgiving just in case it snowed while...

Where is that Viorst book?


Did you hear MSNBC's Chris Matthews is gonna run for Arlen Specter's Pennsylvania Senate seat in 2010?

It's about time!

Arlen has been a little off since that incredulous single-bullet-no-conspiracy JFK investigation.

Besides, Matthews is a native-non-resident of Philadelphia who has learned a lot from Joe Biden who is not from Scranton and HRC who is not a Yankees fan.

His integrity mirrors today's politicians.

He worked for Goldwater then McCarthy; and gushed during Election 2008, "The feeling most people get when they hear an Obama speech...I felt this thrill running up my leg."


Did he say up or down?

Another disciple.


Matthews won "The David Brinkley Award for Excellence in Broadcast Journalism" in 2004.

The namesake once said, "News is what I say it is - it's something worth knowing by my standards!"


He's ready to run; recalling this little sign on another hack's desk: "You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time. Not bad odds!"


Speaking of odds, I'll bet in a Christian kinda way that PBHO is gonna be a pleasant surprise to those who voted against him while an increasing frustration for those who voted for him with celestial expectations.

Look at his emerging administration.

It's a lot different from the last eight years even if it looks a lot like the eight years before GWB.

Not to worry!

PBHO has admitted to recycling some familiar players because of their "fresh thinking" compared to the outgoing administration while asserting "vision for change comes first and foremost...from me."

It's good to be the...

And that is why Ayers/JJ/Sharpton/Wright and the rest of those nutty buddies who helped him along the way ain't pickin' roses in his garden any time soon.

This guy means business.

Crackers and real right-wingers may not like him; but he's not as reckless as they predicted.

Now that he's won the biggest political prize on the planet with a generous helping of every demographic in America, he doesn't need to cater to anyone but, uh, uh, uh,...

We'll see.


Here's one more hint to PBHO's spine.

Do you remember Samantha Power?

She's the foreign policy expert who was canned from PBHO's campaign for calling HRC a "monster" during the primaries.

Well, she's back on the team to help sort out State Department personnel, operations, and policy.

Do you think that sends a message to HRC about who's the new sheriff in town?


Getting back to my dad's 80th, I'd like to mention two more things before the power goes out again or I've got to hurl in the restroom because it's gettin' so hot.

First, my mom asked after saying I was lookin' good despite bein' a little heavy, "Do you think anybody will be upset by some of your KDs?"

Noting the thought had crossed my mind, I said, "Mom, I don't have time to think about that kind of stuff anymore. I spend most of my day with people who are dying, suicidal, sexually confused, hating somebody or feeling hated by somebody, talking behind other people's backs and then talking behind my back when they're talking to those other people, needing an ecclesiastical babysitter, and... You're damned if you do and damned if you don't in the church; so I figure I'll pray and work to do what honors Jesus in the end. If it honors Jesus, folks will be helped in the meantime. If not, at least I tried instead of talking without acting like all of those pewsitters and pulpiteers who criticize everybody else for trying while they just sit on their..."

Second, my dad smiled as I said that.


I will never forget that smile.


The last week was filled with nostalgia.

It's good if it pushes us to pursue dreams so easily forgotten.

It's bad if it causes us to sit in front of the computer like that guy in the second section of today's KD.


Back bumper:


Blessings and Love!

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