I was sitting next to a guy who kept saying he's liberal at yesterday's presbytery meeting - a bunch of clergy and others who pretend to be thinking/saying/doing stuff that's worth more than a damn - and, finally, I blurted out, "If you were that far left, I couldn't sit next to you 'cause I wouldn't be able to stop pukin' which is why I don't sit next to..."
Uncaricaturally unstunned by my, uh, right hook, he blurted back, "My wife says the same thing."
My kinda a guy; and not just because he has the cajones to smoke cigars in front of those clergy and others who do their dirty deeds in secret to maintain the masquerade so, uh, vainly.
I recall a purported exchange between Freud and Jung.
Jung: "Cigars are phallic."
Freud (while drawing mightily on his): "You're right; but they're also cigars."
Washington monuments, Empire State Building(s), Sears Tower(s), Oscars, American Idol(s), PBHO, chrome ponies, 460cc drivers, ragtops, and inflated church membership rolls come to mind.
I've got to make two confessions.
My wife not to mention a former paramour who I helped avoid indictment not to mention church folks who won't repent from not taking care of predecessors/successors because of some predecessors/successors who ripped 'em off and just view their pastors as ecclesiastical hookers to provide a service for less than they deserve but more than they've come to expect until they're spent and then go away never to return not to mention, uh, whomever fits have something in common related to my friend who thinks he's a liberal.
Another birthday will pass without, uh, phallic, uh, uh, uh,...
That's the easy one.
Here's the, uh, harder, confession.
Monday and Tuesday were highlighted by awfully good, uh, geez, darn, blow-my-cover, don't-wanna-admit-it, uh, meetings with clergy and others.
Our family of faith's leaders met on Monday and it was pret' near theophanous; meaning everybody knew He was in charge. God knows I know I haven't been in many meetings in which everybody embraced His unmistakable will to honor Him and advance the Kingdom. Mark it down. 2/9/09. Transliteration: genethe anothen.
Though apostates tried to convince the wavering as well as ignorant to pass an initiative that would have been anathema to Biblical Christianity as upheld by our constitution so far yet so precariously, yesterday's presbytery meeting was actually, gulpin' hard, geez, darn, blow-my-cover, don't-wanna-admit-it, uh, enjoyable; beginning and ending with long drives to and from the meeting near Biloxi with my boss aka administrative assistant who also happens to be the judicatory's permanent clerk which means I've gotta arrive before the meeting starts and stay to the end (penance), worship that actually honored Jesus for a change, reports that weren't as, uh, phallic as usual, surprisingly competent and fair moderatorial leadership, long lunch with guys who genuinely like each other more than less, a technological malfunction that evoked snickers from many and panic in the souls of the anal, and...
No, I did not drop acid before the meeting.
Of course, nothing's perfect.
A quasi-prince of crypto-Scotland - only fans of Braveheart will get this - who has consistently betrayed the brethren cornered me and said so no one else could hear, "You think you're making a difference through your multiple-personality-wise-ass comments and columns and what you write; but if you're so hot, why haven't your constituents ponied up and shut you up with all of your shameless begging?"
I think he really wants to hurt me.
Obviously, he has no idea of what KDs are all about - a metaphorical genre dedicated to tearing down idolatries with no respect for anyone building 'em.
On the other hand, I may make it to my next birthday and...
Staying on confessions, my good buddy who is as shameless about the Cubs as I am about, uh, lots of stuff called and asked what I think about the A-Rod revelations; noting he is one of the few folks in my life who doesn't hate the Yankees.
Well, it's always easier to confess after getting caught; though you'd have a hard time proving that with some of PBHO's nominations to public service.
As much as I like to see idols fall so ultimate affection/allegiance is redirected to Jesus who alone is worthy of such unequivocal enthusiasm and enthronement, I feel deep sorrow for him.
Let me explain.
People have a habit of scapegoating other people for sins that aren't really any worse than the ones that haven't been disclosed in them yet (go back to the last sentence of the first section).
People who light fires in the backyards of other people usually do that to distract attention from their own homes/lives that are burning up/down.
It's kinda sick; but lots of people feel good when other people feel bad which makes 'em feel better about feeling so bad.
Or something like that.
Subscriber comments about the Fairness Doctrine come to mind.
Illinois: "Let's say they pass it, and local broadcasters will have to present both sides of an issue. Given the MSM bobbing (sic) for PBHO (in the tank), it seems to me that objectivity can no longer be claimed by even local stations. The local news will be bombarded by calls: 'Let's hear the other side, not just the government side.' As usual, Democrats and liberals haven't really thought through this. This might herald the end of national broadcasts by Limbaugh and others; but how many people get all their information there anyway?...Oddly, the one station that probably won't really be affected will be Fox, because, like it or not, they have a lot of liberals on their shows; unlike CBS, NBC, ABC, MSNBC, CNN...The only drawback for conservatives is that they tend to be too busy leading productive lives working and raising their families to really step up and apply the heat to the liberals in charge. That's sort of like things in the PCUSA."
Florida: "I was at a luncheon of aging media moguls in December and it was generally agreed that reinstating the Fairness Doctrine would be next to impossible in today's media climate. FD is a disaster, and I am not saying that they won't try, but if they do, they will really tick off a major segment of the American media. So maybe they will stop kissing up to PBHO...The difficulty is that it could put many AM radio stations off the air, and they are already struggling. When it was in effect years ago, there were only a limited number of stations to regulate. With cable now, it would be impossible to enforce. PBHO has the power to do it without Congress. By the way, the movie Broadcast News was an all too accurate picture of the industry."
And from somewhere in the Northeast: "Your last KD included this: 'Shepherds don't follow sheep.' True. But they better not fall asleep while guiding the flock!"
Do you think that has anything to do with my awfully good...?
Blessings and Love!
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