Tuesday, June 29, 2010

June 29, 2010

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)



A friend slipped, fell hard, bruised both arms badly, and ended up in a rehab joint after a few days in the hospital.

I'm kinda old school when it comes to pastoral care.

I always make/find time for people with authentic challenges; which doesn't include shut-ins who can't get to worship but have no problems getting to the mall, hairdresser, or Burger King.

When folks are in the hospital, I try to show up daily for a hug and prayer; and when they move from the hospital to nursing/rehab care, I'll make a visit or two during the transition.

Back to my badly bruised friend, I went to see how she was progressing; and when I arrived at her room, she didn't appear to be there.

As I started writing a note, she called from the bathroom, "I'm in here! Don't go! I've been waiting for someone to wipe me!"

I answered, "___, it's me! Pastor Bob! I'm probably not the best person to help you right now!"

She laughed.

I laughed.

Later, after we prayed, I thought as I left, "Now that's quite a metaphor for ministry."


Staying with metaphors, a pastor/prophet in South Carolina is shaking salt again: "There are a lot of scarecrows standing in pulpits; pointing their congregations in all kinds of directions with assurances that all ways lead to Emerald City."

He continues, "I don't live in Oz. My goal is not Emerald City. My path is no Yellow Brick Road. So I find it deeply disturbing that so many folks are getting directions in life from scarecrows. A head full of straw hardly qualifies anyone for pastoral ministry. But, then again, scarecrows very rarely, if ever, actually proclaim God's truth."

Revealing the catalyst of his chagrin, "Last week, I had a certified (certifiable?) Presbyterian Lay Pastor proudly describe the 'pulpit' that he built for a Boy Scout camp complete with a cross, Star of David, and 'Allah' written in Arabic. Only someone with straw for brains could conclude Allah and Yahweh are one and the same."

Concluding, "I realize I come across as extremely arrogant and exclusive because I do not believe everybody worships the same god. I have no use for inter-religious activities which, in reality, amount to irreligious activities. There is nothing reverent about reverence directed to that which is not to be revered. And, sorry, you fans of three 'Abrahamic' faiths, Yahweh has made it quite clear that there are no other gods besides Him."

Ending, "People may find the idea of a Yellow Brick Road of their choosing that goes wherever they want to go appealing; but for anyone who wants to make God the Father their destination, there is but one way. See John 14:6!"


I'll be thinking about that pastoral/prophetic friend and who needs to be wiped while attending our franchise's big meeting in Vikings land (7/3-10).

Another friend who is the executive director of a paradenominational renewal organization for another mainliner that can't be renewed because it hasn't been newed for nearly four decades said, "Somebody said it's gonna be a circus. I think it's already a zoo."

God help it/us.

The agenda is packed with lots of, uh, stuff that needs to be wiped away from a denomination still claiming to honor Jesus as attested in Holy Scripture and upheld by its constitution.

I won't catalogue the insults to God's holiness because others like www.pcusa.org, www.layman.org, and www.ChurchandWorld.com do a much better job than moi.


Have a barf bag handy.



Staying with metaphors a little longer, you may have heard about the two boys who were watching a circus parade.

One was watching through a hole in the fence on street level.

He was overwhelmed with concern for the clowns, dogs, acrobats, horses, dogs, and the like because he saw they were in close proximity to lions, tigers, and bears...Oh, my!

The other boy was looking down on the parade from the top of a tall building and remained calm.

He could see the big picture; seeing/knowing the clowns, dogs, acrobats, horses, dogs, and the like were safe because the lions, tigers, and bears were in cages.

1 John 4:4 comes to mind.


Everybody needs to be wiped.

That's the bad news.

The good news is that's what He/His does/do best.



Blessings and Love!

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

June 23, 2010

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)



Jesus must be really embarrassed by today's churches; or as Frederick said in Woody Allen's Hannah and Her Sisters, "If Jesus were to come back today and see what's being done in His name, He'd never stop throwing up."

Mark Twain was right: "The church is always trying to get other people to reform; it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little by way of example."

Yeah, I know you can't blame Jesus for some Christians who need some Jesus in their lives; but as I listened to some guy from Newark, New Jersey screaming over the radio while driving back to seminary from my field education assignment near the Delaware Water Gap in the mid 70s, "The only gospel that some folks will ever hear or see is the gospel according to you and me!"


Churches have a lotta, uh, something tellin' the world how to get along when they don't/can't/won't.

Think about it.

Churches say, "Come to us, join us, and help us change the world for the better!"

Yeah, right.

With so many conflicted churches with "members" hating each other in the name of Jesus and more franchises/flavors/denominations than Baskin Robbins advertising how they're better than everybody else, churches look so silly when they say they can enable reconciliation for a divided world.


If they can't reconcile themselves, how the...?


It's time for churches to grow up and model something better in tune with Romans 12:1-2.

The church needs to become the Church and start modeling Christianity as personified in Jesus and prescribed in Holy Scripture rather than some kinda navel-gazing religion.

God knows we know everybody knows the truth of Matthew 23:15 when it comes to too many of today's churches/denominations/pulpiteers/pewsitters.


That's why I've decided to commit the rest of my life and ministry to modeling something more reconciling within by way of example for those who are without.

I started a few years ago by inviting a pastor who was bounced from our church many years ago after only one year to return as a staff member; concentrating on pastoral care to shut-ins.

I'll never forget one elder's caution: "You know his ministry did not go well."

My response: "You're right about that. But so what? If we can't pray and labor to restore relationships in the church, we have no business pretending to tell people how to do it anywhere else."


I'll never forget visiting someone in a nursing home not long after that pastor joined our staff.

She said, "I hear ___ is back! Well, don't send him to see me! I never liked that man!"

So I put her on the top of the list for his first visits.

When I saw her not long after he visited her, she snapped, "You sent him to see me even when I told you not to send him to see me. You did that on purpose!"

My response: "You're right about that."

Then she said, "Well, he's not so bad. You can send him whenever you'd like."

My response: "You were wrong about him; but now you're right."

In short, his return enabled reconciliations that were long overdue.

Maybe that's why my mule is named Jane's Return.


I'm praying/working on more modeling for our family of faith at First in Belvidere, Illinois.

I've invited my predecessor to come back, move the headquarters of his current ministry to an office across the hall from me, and be available for pastoral care and occasional worship leadership.

He's praying about it; and if God gives the green light, we'll present a proposal to our officers.

When word leaked out that it's/he's/He's in the wind, an elder said, "I don't want to upset you; but some folks may go to him before you for some things if he comes back."

My response: "You're right about that."

I'm praying with the pastor of a local "emerging" church in town about them moving in with us and sharing office space and using our sanctuary for worship on Saturday evenings with a proviso that they kick something into the kitty and he preaches for me every now and then when I'm away on Sunday mornings and I preach for him every now and then when he's away on Saturday evenings.

We're praying about it; and if God gives the green light, we'll present a proposal to our officers.

When word leaked out that it's/he's/He's in the wind, a friend/peer said, "I don't want to upset you; but some folks may go to the Saturday service if you do that."

My response: "You're right about that."

Looking at everything but heaven going on in our world and too many churches, we've got to model something better for Christ's sake.

Besides, did you notice the caution?

I don't want to upset you.

There it/they is/are.

It's O.K. to upset Jesus as long as people who are supposed to...

I'd rather be right about/with Jesus than, uh, that.


I may catch everything but heaven for praying/working on such modeling.

Some people are too into idolatry to make it work.

Some people long for the way things never were or maybe were but are no more.

Some people don't like to see anything happen for the first time.

Some people confuse Christianity with how they think, feel, and lust.

Some people embarrass Jesus.


Sounds like dad again.

You may recall he said the same thing when I said BBPBHO would never be elected before the, uh, election and then said BBPBHO will serve two terms: "We live in a rock star culture. We live in a land where someone can make millions for inventing a pet rock or hula hoop. He's a fad. We'll get over him; but not until..."

Guess who just fired the main man fighting the ___heads in Afghanistan because of a few misplaced truths in Rolling Stone?

I predict he'll name Bono as our next...


Bono isn't an American citizen?

Are you sure?

Just check his birth certificate.




I guess I'd rather try something/anything that would model something better than what's going on in too many of today's churches.

Salvation Army founder William Booth said it for me when he said it to Rudyard Kipling: "Young man, if I thought I could win one more soul for Christ by standing on my head and beating a tambourine with my feet, I would learn how to do it."

The Confession of 1967: "The church confesses its faith when it bears a present witness to God's grace in Jesus Christ...God's reconciling work in Jesus Christ and the mission of reconciliation to which He has called His church are the heart of the gospel in any age. Our generation stands in peculiar need of reconciliation in Christ."

In short, depending upon the grace of God to enable/direct/correct, I'd like to try something a little more, uh, Christian than...

Now go back to the first section of this edition.



Blessings and Love!

Friday, June 18, 2010

June 18, 2010

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)


God knows every dad knows it would never happen on Mother's Day; but my youngest's baseball league has scheduled a make-up game for Sunday, uh, Father's Day at 3:00 p.m.


O.K., I'll miss over four hours of World Cup action.


Truly, I'll miss over four hours of the U.S. Open.


Again, this would never happen on...


I'm wondering which show will draw more ratings?

World Cup?


U.S. Open?

Re-runs of BBPBHO's oval office assault on the oil leak?



Getting back to Father's Day which I won't be getting to this year as wife and next to youngest son are away for prospect camps in Indiana and Pennsylvania through late Sunday while I'm missing Tiger's continuing drama or another thrill from Phil, I think a lot about my dad and how I'm thankful for the privilege of still having him around.

Though I don't like to admit it, he's usually right.

When I said BBPBHO would never win because he was/remains totally unprepared for the job, he said, "We live in a rock star culture. We live in a land where someone can make millions for inventing a pet rock or hula hoop. He's a fad. We'll get over him; but not until..."

When I said BBPBHO will serve two terms, he predicted, "We live in a rock star culture. We live in a land where someone can make millions for inventing a pet rock or hula hoop. He's a fad. We'll get over him; but not until..."

He describes Republicans as people who hate to see anything happen for the first time.

He describes Democrats as people with both feet planted firmly in the air; or when you look closely into their eyes, it's hard to discern if they're having a vision of God or just wet themselves.

Parenthetically, he thinks fundamentalists are like Republicans and mainliners are like Democrats.

He has no patience for people who live off the fat of the land while doing everything or nothing for God's sake to destroy it.

He explained the illogic of trying to be rational with the irrational.

He warned that people who ask for mulligans or improve their lies cannot be trusted.

Yeah, he's usually right.



Of course, I know I'm blessed.

I've met lots of folks who don't prize their dads; which may be why I've got a little league baseball game on Sunday afternoon.

One of my older sons doesn't especially prize me; and I deserve a good portion of his disdain.

As Dr. Wolfgang Lowe said to me when I kept asking questions that he couldn't/wouldn't answer while studying in Germany as the USA was about to boot Nixon, "Unfortunately, Herr Kopp, we are not all omniscient."

Be that as it is, I've met lots of folks who can't relate to God as Father because they can't relate to their much too human versions.


Just as you can't blame Jesus for some Christians who could use some Jesus in their lives, God as Father can't be blamed for some fathers who haven't been more than a biological connection to their kids.

God is sovereign as Father, saving as Son Jesus, and sustaining as Holy Spirit; which should make addressing Him as Father kinda cool.

Of course, if you're one of those sickos who make inappropriate transferences...

False witnesses to the truth don't change the, uh, truth.

Bad human images don't change divine realities.

God as Father is good news.

So if you can't celebrate the human version on Sunday when I'll be coaching a baseball game that would never be scheduled on Mother's Day...


Staying with sports, Justin Rose finished 4th as a 17 year old in the 1998 British Open at Royal Birkdale.

Everybody thought he was destined for stardom.

It didn't really happen until he won this year's Memorial (6/3-6 in Dublin, Ohio); prompting this candid/cold observation/confession from a reporter: "Well, there is an expiration date on expectations, a moment when you either have to arrive or excuse yourself" (Golf World, 6/14/10).

That brought more old advice from my dad back to mind: "Potential doesn't complete the job. Jesus did not quit until He finished the job."


I thought about that while meeting with a predecessor, founding visionary of the Confessing Church movement, and pastor of a local "emerging" church in town.

We've concluded the church needs to become the Church and start modeling Christianity rather than some kinda navel-gazing religion.

With that in mind, we're praying about how God can use us in mutual submission to each other in ministry in reality more than theory.

We're convinced that would make our Father very happy.

Admittedly, we know it'll be a hard adjustment for folks who are into idolatry, the way things never were or maybe were but are no more, and the commonalities of fundamentalists/Republicans and mainliners/Democrats.


We're going to live a lot longer with our Father than anybody else; so picking priorities is a no-brainer.

Kinda like coaching a baseball game for my kid on Father's Day.

Kinda like the Rose story as metaphor for...



Blessings and Love!

Monday, June 14, 2010

June 14, 2010

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)



With his body falling apart and swing resembling Arnie's at his worst without mentioning other distractions, Tiger's assault on the Golden Bear's record in majors seems less likely than Elin never having to work another day in her life.

Jack's advice: "Every year when I started golf, I'd go back to Jack Grout and say, 'O.K., I'm a beginner.' That's why I like to take the fall off. I'm a beginner. I start with the grip, posture, fundamentals" (interview transcript, 1999 Memorial).

Sounds like a metaphor for mainliners.

Like this: "Getting good at this game, then staying good, is a tough and lonely and endless journey, with lots of dead-ends and other frustrations to strain your body and stress your mind along the way. Which, of course, is why so few of the tens of thousands who set out on it get very far along it" (My Story, 1997).


I've been thinking a lot about what I'm gonna do with what's left of my life and ministry.

Old and still marketable enough to seek a higher agenda than the least common denominators of parish ministry that often inhibit Biblically Christocentric fidelities in favor of navel-gazing imposters, I've been asking why I got into this in the first place.

Well, yeah, the facts, feelings, faith, and friendships lined up to compel the path to ordained parish ministry; but I think I'd be a tad more secure in an existential kinda way if I'd become a...

You know what I mean; and if you don't, it ain't no use tryin' to explain to ya.

It's like trying to explain freedom to people who prefer chains.

Getting back to the question, I recall one of my preaching students at Kansas City's Nazarene Theological Seminary who began a sermon back in the early 80s, "We are forced to think of life and death issues when we're hatched, matched, and dispatched."

Though I don't think I'm ready to be dispatched because of what the Lord has told me about what's gonna happen in our family of faith at First in Belvidere, Illinois before Jesus comes back, I know the days left aren't as many as the days spent; so I wanna make the most of 'em.


Why didn't I become a...?

Because I believe I'm called to point people to Jesus as Lord and Savior.

Because I believe I'm called to explain the existential and eternal benefits of a saving relationship with Him.

Because knowing Jesus enables anyone to live triumphantly amid the meanness, madness, and misery of life in the modern world.

Because loving Jesus includes loving like Jesus; and that is the only hope for a world that's so contentious, cantankerous, and consistently cruel.

Because people who really love Jesus invite, welcome, include, and unconditionally love everybody; providing a safe haven amid life's storms that doesn't exclude Republicans, Democrats, gays, straights, and just about every other pigeon-holing category that Christian posers use to pretend they're that much better than everybody else.

Or something like that.


Here's what I said about it during yesterday's sermon: "When I die, I hope people will say, 'He was a little nutty and a lotta fun. He loved Jesus; and he loved people enough to tell them about Jesus."

It's hasn't always been easy.

I've made lots of mistakes and I'm gonna make more; and from what I read in the Bible and have witnessed through the years, only the deeply deluded and demonically possessed pretend there's no room for improvement in their lives.

Parenthetically, I like to make mistakes because it proves I'm still thinking, trying, and know why Jesus came.

Every day hasn't been a hot fudge sundae.

My greatest disappointments have been failing to convince people who hate other people in a Christian kinda way that people who really love Jesus love like Jesus and overcome what naturally divides 'em through Jesus.

Even in my current call, following a pastor who got it/Him, I've had to deal with a few folks who never got it/Him as attested by their irreconcilable behaviors.

Simply, if you love Jesus, you love people who love Jesus and work out your differences through Him.

I refuse to believe Jesus advocates separation, segregation, and sectarianism of the saints; and if you disagree, find a Bible with John 17 in it.

In other words, I've returned to why I started; and I'm having lots of fun.

Again, Jack: "Life is an adventure. You do the best you can to plan, but you never know what's going to happen. It's kind of nice to not know what is around the corner. That's the adventure" (during GB's 70th birthday press conference for USA Today, 2010).



I'm often asked, "What should we call you?"

My response: "I'm called many things."

My prayerful preference: "His."


Blessings and Love!

Monday, June 7, 2010

June 7, 2010

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)



My favorite poet is John David Burton.

Tony Campolo: "He articulates feelings that have been too deep for some of us to utter."

Sample: "I cannot love you as you wish, nor take the plunge into you you open up to me...There is a larger, unknown world I have to know and to that world I go, alone."

Peggy Campolo: "Succinct, yet hauntingly beautiful. An illuminating journey into the masculine mind and soul."

Sample: "Two nice ladies, scolding me, cry 'Heresy!' because they see in my poetry reference to sex. It is as curious as it can be that their husbands never say harsh words to me. A wise, old friend explains it to me. 'John, you see, the trouble is that in those families the women wear the pants.' Could he be right? Is there a chance that these nice ladies want me at bay because their husbands too seldom say, 'Dear, take off your pants?'"

Bruce Larson: "Your poetry is a traveling deep."

Sample: "I am hungry to be seeing where the mountains meet the sea, wondering to find if there be aught in me of joy to come alive at an offering of beauty."

Tom Gillespie: "Poetry that is both earthy and spiritual, practical and profound, ordinary and exotic."

Sample: "She is my friend. Another time, another place, were ours the choice, we might have married or at least have gone to bed together. Instead, in this time and place we agree on a line past which we will not go, our selfish choice not to settle for sex per se at the cost of love let go."

Again, Tony Campolo: "When John David left seminary to become pastor of the First Presbyterian Church of Mt. Holly, New Jersey, one of his classmates told him, 'That's not a very prestigious church and, if you go there, nobody will ever know where you are or hear about you again.' To that he answered, 'God will know where I am and the only applause I need comes from a single pair of nail pierced hands.'"

Sample: "She is widowed now. Her husband was my friend. Not long ago, he died, leaving a lonesome place against her sky and mine...One day she said, 'I need someone to touch who will touch me and let me know that I am alive.' Now, when I see her, I kiss her full upon the lips instead of proper peck on cheek, and hold her close and give her a gentle slap upon her butt, not because I mean to go to bed with her just now, but because I hear her say, 'I need someone to touch who will touch me and let me know that I am alive.'"

Me: "A rare coupling of clarity, candor, wisdom, and gentleness."

Sample: "Those related to Another are related to each other. 'Apart in time,' the theorem says. There is another word, believed with heart's repeated beat: 'We shall meet.'"

He went home to Jesus in 2004 about a week after being hospitalized with colon cancer.

His obit said he was a pastor, professor, and chaplain.


Relatively famous for a cleric.

But I will always remember two thoughts that keep transforming my life and ministry.

First: "Years of school prompt my distrust of and disinterest in the academic."

It remains the best commentary of 1 Corinthians 1:18-25 - an etiological hint to the rise and fall of mainline Christianity.

Second: "Some readers may see an inconsistency in my clergy vocation and what is written on these pages...Other readers may be sensitive to the sexuality/sensuality of the poems. Sex happens to be one arena where love, hate, grief, and joy are expressed...My fantasy is that what I write, as part of what I do, may prompt us to be real, true in the sense implied by the centurion, Caesar's man at God's event or, perhaps, God's man at Caesar's event."

A friend does not understand KDs.

Hence, he will not go to www.amazon.com to buy some of my favorite poet's books.

If I have to explain that, you've probably skipped this section already.

Some people like to remain ignorant.


That has nothing to do with academics; or as another mentor, John Robertson, warned me as a seminary intern in Belvidere, New Jersey, "Don't separate yourself from God and people by degrees."



Only a few years removed from the ivy league, the real nurturing of my call began in New Jersey with patient elders who taught me how to be their pastor.

It had little to do with what I had "learned" in college, seminary, Geneva, Rome, or Heidelberg.

They said, in effect, "We don't care how much you know as much as wanting to know how much you care."

"Graduate" school began when Pastor Leroy showed up to preach at the invitation of "my session" that actually cared about real meat for body and soul.

He had served a few decades in the joint, "got saved in there" (his words), and was determined to "save others" (his words).

He had no degrees.

Geez, he didn't have a high school diploma.

He butchered Elizabethan English.

His sermons weren't even close to three perceivable points ending with a pretty poem in keeping with Sunday's pretended proprieties.

But when he called people to the chancel steps to give their lives to Jesus so He could give life to them...

Mainliners have the most educated clergy on the planet.

Mainline denominations are being flushed quicker than poop through a goose as new churches emerge with "leaders" whose only qualification seems to be a passion to love Jesus by loving like Jesus.

Dang, they don't even know the difference between Calvin and...

They don't care about them.

They care about Him.

Their "emerging" churches are called naive, superficial, Christianity Lite, lacking credentials, and...

They gather in storefronts, warehouses, school auditoriums, converted malls, and...

They don't wear vestments, print bulletins, keep membership rolls, or "dress up" for worship.

And, unlike mainliners who are quick to diss 'em, they ignore mainliners and act like we don't even exist.

I guess that's what happens when lampstands are removed.


Jim and Tammy.

You remember them.

I visited their playground near Charlotte.

I was repulsed by their confusing theology, homiletics, liturgy, lack of polity, and...

I was stunned by their color, class, and cultural diversity that mainliners advocate yet hardly incarnate.

So when Jimmy fell for Jessica, mainliners joshed and joked and exclaimed, "Told ya so..."

But after one particularly green-eyed presbyter growled with glee in condemning 'em as if that somehow redeemed our failures to honor Jesus with enthusiasm and without equivocation according to Holy Scripture, I could not contain my outburst: "Well, they may be a little funky; but they've led more people to Jesus than any Presbyterian, Methodist, Lutheran, Episcopalian, or the like that I've ever seen."

I think that ended any hopes of me ever becoming moderator of anything in the mainline.


While pastor of a predominantly black church in Ohio, I complained, "Mrs. ___ hates me because I'm white."

A black judge said, "She's just ignorant!"

Just like some people who think knowledge and wisdom can be attained by collecting papers to hang on walls.

Wait a second.

I want to check something.

I'm back.

I just went over to my papers hanging on the wall to impress people who come to my study.

They're covered with dust.

Kung: "The Church's agenda is to discover what is permanent - originally meant, before it was covered with the dust and debris of two thousand years...This is not another gospel, but the same ancient gospel rediscovered for today!"

That's what Burton tried to do in his poetry.

That's what I should have picked up from Leroy.

That was Robertson's warning.

That's why churches are emerging while the mainline is dying.



Blessings and Love!

Friday, June 4, 2010

June 4, 2010

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)



My friends to the right are annoyed because I don't think BBPBHO is the antichrist; though he could be a prophet to the...

My friends to the left are annoyed because I won't join them in breaking the first two of God's top ten when it comes to BBPBHO; though I admit that blaming him for the crumbling of the empire is as silly as blaming GWB for everything that their idol's rhetoric has failed to accomplish.

Or as I say in most mediations of any kind, "There are three sides to every story: your side, their side, and the truth."



Moretheless, this ain't no time for OJT on Pennsylvania Avenue.

If he can't even fix an oil leak...

Calling James Cameron to leave Hollywood for the Gulf hasn't exactly bolstered confidence; though Titanic and Avatar can really distract ya from reality.

Speaking of distractions from reality and knowing his staff consider every crisis to be an opportunity to advance their humanly unperceivable agenda, maybe...



Seriously, if we can moonwalk, probe outer space, connect the globe via the net, and certify the humanity of Marilyn Manson, you'd think we could fix a broken pipe in the Gulf.

Just as seriously, if Christianity has been around for such a long time with so many people claiming Jesus as Lord of their existences as well as eternities, you'd think...



Is it just me or does everything and everyone seem so...?

It's getting really, really, really funky.

Maybe these are the last days; for as anyone remotely familiar with that kinda literature knows, bad things (aka birth pangs of the eschaton) increase in intensity and frequency just before...

With so much going so wrong around the globe and in the country, mainliners don't seem part of the antidote as their survival appears even more bleak than wildlife and tourism in the Gulf.

Maybe it's time for folks to take a long look at Psalm 62.

There is an answer.

Mainliners used to point in His direction.

Presidents used to defer to Him.

Now back to Psalm 62...


Blessings and Love!

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

June 1, 2010

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)


One of my three favorite brothers-in-law has taken up beekeeping as a hobby.

He knows more about bees than mainliners know about Jesus; and unlike mainliners who don't seem too excited about hardly anything anymore except for who gets the properties and assets when churches expire or exit, he's as evangelistically obnoxious about 'em as I am about mules, links, and Jesus (but not in that order).

He has told me more about bees since hanging out with 'em over the past 2 years than I've ever heard about Jesus in nearly 35 years of hanging out with mainline clergy of all flavors and franchises.

His passion for bees is contagious.

His enthusiasm compels my attention.

Metaphors inferred, I'm learning new things about, uh, bees.

Aside from praising God for Christians believing more in resurrection than reincarnation, which means I don't have to worry about coming back as one of those drone bees that cash in after a one-nighter with the queen, I didn't know honey is bee barf.

That's gotta mean something too.



When I was addicted to plastic for procuring new golf clubs because I thought I could buy more game, I forgot another transferable metaphor: "Your greener pasture was somebody else's brown field."

Or as I tell guys who are buzzing around, "If she's so much hotter than your wife, why'd her old man throw her under the bus for somebody else?"

While it could mean one guy's barf is another's honey, I also like this advice: "The grass is greener where it's watered."



I was shopping for a Ping blade putter (Tess) about 8 years ago along South Carolina's Grand Strand.

Proving the suspicions of people who are always looking for more reasons to hate me, I play right-handed and putt left-handed because I can't putt right-handed which always prompts my dad to exclaim while leaving the first hole whenever we play, "I've got news for you, son! You can't putt left-handed either!"

Anyway, a pro in a big golf shop said, "That putter only comes in a right-handed model."

Matthew, who was about 4 at the time, ran up to me with a left-handed model of the putter that the pro said only came in a right-handed model and screamed with fresh discovery, "Is this the one that you're looking for, daddy?"

The pro turned red while I dished out the green, uh, plastic.

Of course, that's not the end of the story.

I've tried to replace that putter with several others since then; but I keep coming back to it because it, uh, suits me.



Yes, change is good if, uh, change enables improvement.

Yes, change is bad if, uh, change makes things worse.


The executive branch of our government has changed.

America decided GWB was sooooooo bad that anybody related to him was unelectable.

Hence, BBPBHO.

America decided to laud the latest star from Chicago's political machine with almost or, uh, really, actual messianic anticipations.

In the next two years, America will decide if that change was/is/remains good or bad.


Watch the economy, Gulf, Korea, Israel, Iraq, Iran, Afghanistan, investigation of Chicago-style-directed politics manipulating Pennsylvania's run for the Senate, if he meets with Arizona's Governor after dissing her with/for Mexico's President, where LeBron lands, and...

The changes may not be done if the changes don't change what appears to be the decline of the empire.

Americans, after all or at least for a little more than two centuries, aren't used to leaders who like Avis.



Blessings and Love!