Thursday, January 27, 2011

A Loser Looks at the Super Bowl - January 27, 2011

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)

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I just got back from one of those save-the-denomination-from-the-infidels meetings.

That's not unusual for me.

As a pastor in a mainline franchise - PCUSA or Presbyterian for short which means nothing to inquirers/seekers or even some believers who don't think Jesus and Presbyterians go together very well and next to nothing to more sophisticated religionists who want to know the brand - for over 50% of my life, I seem to have gone to as many of 'em as there are dollars in the national deficit.

Not only do I write books that don't sell, pour out my guts in a book on biker culture as metaphor and challenge to the church yet to be published by somebody who wants to make lots of $, have a son who hates me, hear from folks who are excited about the invitation to blame me for whatever needs blaming (go to the 1/17/11 edition), and love a congregation that has no clue on how much I love 'em including those who don't hang around except for the inactive roll or transfer pathologies to me to satiate something, I've been part of a denomination that hasn't had a spike in membership for longer than I've been around.

If that doesn't make me feel like a loser - Jerry Maguire's former girlfriend comes to mind - do you know what it's like to read some really awfully written books that actually sell and then come to the daunting realization that your, uh, my books that don't sell must really, really, really suck?

I don't like the last word of the last sentence either; but it captures my feelings on the subject.

Do you know what it's like to see some really awful preacher on television or know some really awful pastor of the biggest church in your town and then come to the daunting realization that you, uh, I must really, really, really suck by comparison?

I don't like the third word from the end of the last sentence either; but it captures my feelings on the subject.

I feel like such a loser so often with so many so willing to enable the...

Maybe that's why I keep going to those save-the-denomination-from-the-infidels meetings.

It's where I belong.

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I had another apocalyptic moment while leaving Starbucks on my way to this morning's save-the-denomination-from-the-infidels meeting.

Caffeine helps prepare me for those kinda things.

Anyway, my favorite non-denominational covenant brother dropped in for some caffeine; and I wondered if he was going to a...

And as we we walked out together, it hit me!

I said, "It just hit me! I know why you guys are in 'emerging' churches. God is so sick and tired of the other kinds that do so little for Christ's sake that He has removed their lampstands so that new ones can emerge!"

As we drove our separate ways - don't miss that metaphor - I felt really good about feeling badly on what I'd just kinda figured out in an apocalyptic kinda way.

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Staying with losers like me, the Bears and Jets come to mind.

Too little too late in both games.

Of course, you coulda read all about it back on 9/9/10 in the "Annual Pre-Season NFL Power Rankings" of KD.

I had the Packers ranked 4th and the Steelers ranked 7th with some amazing, if I say so myself, assessments of the Jets ("They remind me of Boise State!") and Bears ("Sleeper! Just look at the QB's face after an interception!").

Good games...for the Packers and Steelers.

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The best teams won and will meet in Super Bowl XLV at Cowboys Stadium on 2/6.

Heroic comebacks by the Bears and Jets proved their courage more than competence.

The Bears' QB does look like a sleeper and the Jets' QB is a booger; though I'm not sure what to say about that victory, uh, celebration by Pittsburgh's RM and BR after taking a knee...

Ouch.

Never short of unsolicited opinions, here's my take on the next most important game of all time.

Pittsburgh's QB is a throwback when it comes to toughness. And how about his escapability? I mean, let's face it, he's been escaping from the long arm of the, uh, uh, uh, defense(s) for a long time.

Green Bay's QB is not quite as tough; but certainly more skilled and intelligent; and ready to replace Favre in the hearts of cheeseheads.

The receivers are comparable with the edge going to the Steelers because Ward is the NFL's most complete receiver and never takes off a down.

The running game belongs to the Steelers with, uh, Humpty Dumpty from Illinois right, uh, behind Big Ben in, uh, uh, uh, whatever; though Iron City's offensive line sometimes looks like it's overdosed on St. John's Wort.

Green Bay's special teams are much better.

The defenses, really, are about the same with the Steelers being a tad overrated and the Packers being a tad underrated.

The coaching edge goes to the Steelers; especially since Tomlin has made the three rivers fans forget about his posing predecessor. He's gonna surpass Noll's records before all is said and done.

Intangibles?

Tough one.

Green Bay and Pittsburgh are two of the four most storied franchises in the NFL with great/loyal/OCD fans; along with some posers who just hooked on to their wagons because they couldn't root for the perpetually losing teams of their childhood (see the 1/19/11 edition) which brings some posing Yankees and Lakers fans to mind.

While the Bears and Jets should be happy in exceeding knowledgeable pre-season assessments, Green Bay and Pittsburgh deserve to be in the Super Bowl.

Only people on acid and Patriots fans dispute that; kinda like folks who think Al Davis is good for football, the Cowboys are America's team, and Sarah Palin or Nancy Pelosi would be great as...

I still SP is really hot and NP is not.

Ergo, with Rodgers finally emerging from the shadow of his predecessor, I pick the Packers (27) over the Steelers (24).

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Getting back to my save-the-denomination-from-the-infidels meeting earlier today, I went with an extraordinarily articulate and persuasive theologian and homiletician.

After confessing some sins to each other in a covenantal kinda way, he said, "Evil has a way of sneaking up on us in startling ways. For example, evil doesn't say, 'Let's get them to worship some rocks in the public park. No, they're much too sophisticated for that. Football is much easier.'"

Whoa.

Hmm.

Do you think there's more passion for Jesus, the Packers, or Steelers in your church?

It's one of those things that people just can't keep to themselves.

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Blessings and Love!

2 comments:

Reformed Catholic said...

Steelers ... there's one person you never expect to see in the pews at 11am when the Steeler's are at home, even if the game starts later in the day.

At the church we attended previously when SWMBO was attending PTS, you saw more Steeler's black and gold than shirts and ties on game day, but at least they were there.

Of course, the pastor does put Join us for the Big Game, before the Steeler's game! on the church sign ;)

Dr. Robert R. Kopp said...

Absolutely!