Living a Lie for Almost 4 Decades

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)

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Cliff Mansley is pastor of Joplin, Missouri's New Creation Church.

I was his mentor nearly 3 decades ago; and he has been mine for the last decade as our Lord has used him to break the chains to pret' near damned imperial priesthood as part of His renewed call to authenticity.

As you've read here or learned via www.belvpresbyterian.org and www.bnnsradio.com, our family of faith at First has partnered with him and other churches to bring relief to Joplinites through New Creation Church.

Anyway, Cliff preached in Belvidere last Sunday; and, between services, God used him to expose a lie that I've been living for almost 4 decades.

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Noting we observe the sacrament by intinction, Cliff asked, "Why don't you look people in the eyes when you serve communion?"

I said, "Because I don't want people to look at me and be distracted from Him. That's why I haven't looked people in the eyes for almost 4 decades."

He said, "You are called to communion with Him and His and that happens when you connect through eyeball to eyeball and spirit to spirit during the sacrament. I believe you're wrong in your approach and I'd like you to think about it. Moreover, when you do look people in the eyes, I have seen our Lord use you to..."

Because he mentioned something that can only be experienced, I cannot complete the last sentence of the previous paragraph.

I said, "Cliff, I will pray about this between services; and if..."

During the prayer, I was convinced of Cliff's constructive Christlike correction and compelled to look people in the eyes during the second service.

Now, the lie.

I have/had spent almost 4 decades using the rationalization offered Cliff upon his inquiry.

Truth is I couldn't bare to look people in the eyes because I love them so much and felt/feel so badly in knowing so many of them talk behind my back in less than redemptive ways and would/will reject me without warning as soon as I fail to...

It just hurt so much to express my love through such vulnerably transparent eyes knowing...

He spoke, "If any man would come after Me, he must..."

I listened.

I heard.

And I saw what Cliff saw and...

I will look people in the eyes during the sacrament from last Sunday's second service on.

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Jesus did not say, "Behold, I make all things old."

Holy Scripture does not even slightly suggest everything stays the same when intimate with Him.

While this comes as a surprise to folks who believe He stopped inspiring new music after the green hymnbook of the 30s or red one of the 50s or blue binder of the 70s, our Lord always has new and fresh and exciting ways to know Him and make Him known.

Lies.

They distract from the truth.

Jesus.

And only He can save.

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I thank God for using Cliff to expose a lie that I had been living for almost 4 decades.

I said I was doing it for God when I was really doing it for me.

I wonder how many other lies are...

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Blessings and Love!