Monday, September 19, 2011

Banter and Moan Ministries

Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)

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It just hit me.

I don't complain much anymore.

With sooooooo many bantering and moaning about everyone and everything these days, I figure somebody's gotta give up, uh, pitching for receiving.

People gotta crucify somebody for their sins.

God knows how that goes.

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Seriously, I've been thinking about putting a sign on my study's door: "Banter and Moan Ministries."

I'll start this Sunday!

Hey, I'm not kidding.

Why not?

I spend sooooooo much time listening to folks banter and moan about...

It's sooooooo pathetically real beyond the irony to observe Americans who have sooooooo much bantering and moaning about...

No wonder Mother Teresa quipped upon being asked what she thought of our prosperity and power, "I have never seen such poor people in my life."

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I used to be disappointed about 'em all; until I got the original sin and total depravity thing.

I think of people who pray that there's not a big war with WMDs that wipe out lots of people.

Not me.

I pray, "Whoa, Lord, thanks for the extra time! People are hating each other sooooooo much these days that I'm stunned that we're still ticking! Whatever You're doing to keep us from the logical conclusion to our cantankerous, cranky, and cruel nature, dankeroo!"

I don't expect people to do anything other than hate each other; unless, of course, you know, they really start behaving like they really believe in Jesus which means loving Jesus by loving like Jesus.

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I'm not talking about the church.

Yeah, that's my ghetto; but every part of our global and national cultures are going through the same thing.

Hate.

As Bishop Camara warned long ago, it's a spiral of violence that we can't seem to exit.

People can't seem to help themselves from bantering, beating, bruising, butchering, and...

Really, I'm not talking about the church; 'cause the church, the real one consisting of people who really love Jesus by really loving like Jesus, is counter those cultures.

Hmm.

Gulp.

Sigh.

There aren't too many of 'em around these days.

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While the one that I pray I'm, uh, serving is trying more than less these days like the remnant of others, we still let people get away with murder if you know what He means.

Come to think of it, one of the best but few examples of what He has in mind for folks who claim to be part of His church is Special Olympics.

You know, the people who are considered "challenged" who play games.

Less than two weeks ago, I participated in the "unified" golf division of the Illinois Special Olympics State Championships in Decatur, Illinois after winning the sectional with my partner Billy.

Billy is considered "challenged" and I am considered, uh, "normal."

Let's go there.

Billy is always loving, joyful, calm, patient, kind, and so on.

Not me.

Hmm.

Gulp.

Sigh.

Maybe we need better definitions for "challenged" and "normal" 'cause a world/nation/church dominated by people like Billy would be a lot better than...

From what I've seen, challenged is better than normal.

Anyway, there was a big dance on the eve of the last round.

About 1000 Special Olympians were dancing to the/their/His music; and you gotta see it to, uh, see it.

It's the best illustration of dancing in the Lord that I've ever seen.

Well, after the dance, I talked to the DJ.

I asked what he thought of it.

He said, "It was unbelievable. I've never seen sooooooo many people having such a good time; dancing every dance and not complaining about any of the music that I played."

Then he asked, "Do you know how that feels?"

"Uh, no," I responded.

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Getting back to "Banter and Moan Ministries," I'm gonna have my administrative assistant list a time on Sundays for folks to come and banter and moan about whatever they want to banter and moan about.

I'm gonna hang a sign on the door of my study: "Banter and Moan Ministries - Open for Busyness - 9:15 - 9:30 a.m."

Considering all of the bantering and moaning in our world and country and even the church that I serve which, I gotta admit, sorry for the candor, is better than lots, only 15 minutes may not seem like enough time.

Psst.

It won't take much time.

Taking a cue from Jesus, I'm gonna ask, "Do you want to be well?"

Specifically, "Do you want to be happy and whole and eternally secure?"

Some don't want to be well; and I'll tell 'em to come back when they want to be well.

But for those who want to be well, I'll say with a big smile, "Excellent! Let's forget all of the bantering and moaning stuff. Let's talk about Jesus."

Then they won't have the chance to complain.

Then they'll recognize they don't have the luxury to complain because sooooooo many others are complaining.

Then they'll no longer be a part of the ailment.

They'll be part of the antidote.

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People who really know Jesus make Him known through talk, walk, and appearance.

They don't have time for bantering and moaning.

They're too busy cooperating with Father, Son, and Holy Spirit in life-saving those who are drowning in such meanness, madness, and misery.

God knows how that goes.

Those who know God know that as, uh, well.

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Blessings and Love!

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