Kopp Disclosure
(John 3:19-21)
@#$%
@#$%
It was early
Sunday morning.
I was drinking a
BP smoothie at McDonald's and deciding whether to go low or high or Gothic or
warehouse or pew or folding-chair church.
When I'm away
from my undershepherding
call in Belvidere, Illinois and spending time with my parents, sister, and kin
in Forty Fort, Pennsylvania, that's about my biggest decision apart from where
to eat the only pizza on the planet worth eating: Dough Company, Grotto,
Sabatini's, Januzzi's, Serpico's, Pizza L'Oven, Victory Pig, or...
Go to the right
column and click on 10th for
FLHTCU for more on that and how an airplane ticket just appears
instantaneously whenever I tell my mom and wife that I'm going to ride my
pony to Pa.
Really, I swear in a remotely Christian kinda way that
pizza west of Harrisburg is Wonderbread layered with Hunt's and pale Velveeta.
Chicago hot dogs
are the best.
Truly, truly, I saith unto thee...
Chicago pizza is
like the guy who never plays guard for the Bulls - waaaaaaay overrated.
Anyway, thanks to
a socket next to the window next to about three others doing the same thing, I
was charging up my Gateway Computer Notebook.
That's when it
happened.
He stepped on my
computer with the full force of a behemoth who makes Taft look like Twiggy in a
Danskin.
It broke into
three totally shattered/smashed pieces.
Not even the
Rayovac Netbook Battery survived the pounding.
He said, "I
didn't see it. It happens."
Yeah, I
could see
that.
Yeah, it happens.
Moretheless, he wasn't
really, uh, with it,
uh, if you know what I mean.
So I just looked
at him, smiled, and said nothing.
I figured it was
time to learn how to use my dumb phone.
God works in
mysterious ways.
@#$%
I'd rather ride
my pony.
Buuuuuuut if mom and wife
are buyin' and it means a few extra hours with the octogenarians, I'ma leavin' on a...
Besides, more
pizza.
Of course, I
still, uh, don't like to fly, uh, in a plane.
Why can't I have
a whole can of tomato juice?
Where have the
peanuts gone?
Why did TSA make
me take off my windbreaker vest but the lady with the big bulky knit sweater
that Taft could have...?
A load of Eastern
Europeans transferred from some international flight to mine and...
You could have
poured gallons of Axe on...
It was even more
toxic than those midnight masses with Ruthie back in 1968.
Then a little kid
barfed on a guy across the aisle and her momma scolded, "I told you
not to eat three pieces of Chicago-style pizza!"
I could have told
her that.
The woman next to
me quickly brought to mind several pericopes in Proverbs if you know what I mean; so
I pulled out my ESV Study Bible, she opened her Cosmo, and that was that.
Yeah, I'd rather
ride my pony; buuuuuuut...
God works in
mysterious ways.
@#$%
"Pray for a
Nation in Need of Healing!"
Baptist church
sign near the airport as dad drove through the downpour, mom told me who died,
and I sat in the backseat thinking of the little kid on the plane with the
stinky Eastern Europeans...
My mom asked if I
ever think about trimming my facial hair.
I said it's a
Numbers 6 thing.
Didn't register.
She said,
"Your sister says you look like your head is upside down."
I said Karry and
I are going to audition for ZZ Top before Vicki or Leslie file...
Didn't register.
My dad said BBPBHO
says the terrorists are not real Muslims.
I asked, "Is
that ignorance or deception?"
He said,
"Geez, Bobby, I don't really give a..."
Yeah, that sign
was perfectly timed.
God works in
mysterious ways.
@#$%
We went to Cuz's
Bar and Grill in Exeter for Saturday night mass.
Cuz and the rest
of Steel City Mafia NE-Pennsylvania-style were in business.
Lloyd, Russell,
Frenchy, and Lipps were getting $25-30 a crack from idolaters.
I looked for the
Asherah pole dancers.
Being a Giants
fan, I felt like an 81er at a rally of Outlaws.
Despite my
disallegiance, I said to somebody my age wearing a number 86 jersey like a Cub
Scout in heat, "Ward is my favorite player of all time."
Orgasmically, he
swooned, "Rice couldn't tie his shoes, man."
My sister's
friend confessed, "I think Frenchy just copped a..."
I understood.
God works in
mysterious ways.
@#$%
I like to shop in
Wilkes-Barre Salvation Army stores.
Money goes to a
good cause.
I can travel
light by pony...or plane if
I tell mom and wife that...
The young cashier
seemed distraught.
I asked what's
wrong.
She cried,
"My son has cancer and he's going to..."
I prayed with her
on the spot; and nobody in line seemed disturbed.
That was the
Saturday morning before the Sunday morning when he stepped on my
computer.
God works in
mysterious ways.
@#$%
I think He needs
to step on more computers.
@#$%
@#$%
Blessings and Love!
4 comments:
Ouch! I don't believe I have the irenic spirit to simply smile if a mastadon stepped on my laptop. I think that may be why my lesson seems to be taking so long between calls, I'm still too quick to take offense and get p.o'd at people/stuff.
Speaking of stepped on...I remember, somewhat vaguely, a novel I was required to read while at PTS. The title was "Silence," by, I believe, a Japanese author. The ultimate moment in the narrative came when an imprisoned missionary stomped on a small picture of Jesus in order to spare other Christians from torture. Throughout the story you read of all that the priest would/wouldn't do because of his love for Jesus. No one was going to be able to ever call him an apostate! Stomp on my Jesus and I'll tear into you without hesitation!
But, here's the thing, well actually probably two things: 1) Jesus doesn't want us to loose it when anyone steps on anything, except perhaps if what's getting stepped on is one of his saints. Otherwise we are to remain cool. 2) For the sake of his, we are even to be prepared to step on the Lord himself, if our seeming act of apostasy is the means of delivering others from being afflicted. He can deal with our stepping on him, for his sake, and the sake of those he loves, because even such "apostate" acts cannot separate us from the grip of his love.
BTW, you're right about pizza, though there are southern as well as western limits. As to hot dogs, I confess I've never had a Chicago dog, but if I ever get to IL I will gladly let you buy one for me. For now, my money is on the dogs served up at Johnny and Hanges in Hawthorne (formerly Paterson) NJ.
The Lord bless your day!
(Oh, and I know I'm crazy, but at his prime, I would take Homer Jones over any deep threat in the history of the NFL. Being a Giants fan you are one of the few who would know who Homer Jones is.)
No mule in my garage. Could borrow my brother-in-law's, but probably won't. Saw one the other day that was the best looking piece of machinery I have seen in a long time: '72 candy apple red Harley! Also met its rider - helluva great guy. Temptation has settled in my heart: not envy or covetousness, temptation. Could almost see myself riding that baby.
Bob,
Only you can take what everyone else would overlook and see the mysteries of God at work. You've given us a look into the unseen world of God at work!
May blessings overtake you and the visit be unforgettable in a good, God kind of way!
Ella Jane
Truly, while He sustains my Beruf, saints like you, Kathie, and others who get the KDs encourage it/me.
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