Ask Your Pastor
My relationship with the Flott family goes back to 2006 or within a year of my arrival on the Corner of Lincoln and Main as undershepherd to the Good Shepherd.
It began when Bill, a Special Olympian of renown with a world golf championship in 1995 under his belt, cornered me at a welcoming meet and greet: “I hear you play golf. Let’s play sometime.”
I said, “Yes, I do; but I play very early in the morning because my days are always very busy.”
He said, “I’ve got my habits.”
I said, “You’ll have to change your habits if you’re going to play with me.”
Then he tested me.
He got up late one morning, rushed out to tell me that he had to eat breakfast, and that he’d be ready to go in 15-30 minutes.
I said, “We’ll play again sometime.”
Bill has not been late for a tee time since then.
It wasn’t long before mom (Sue), dad (Fleming), and sister (Muffet) sensed along with my wife and sons that Bill and I got along rather well.
For those that understand charismata or gifting within the context of Romans 12 and 1 Corinthians 12, they knew/know that I knew/know Bill is like a brother, son, and friend.
Unlike preaching, I have never had to raise my voice with Bill to get my point across to him.
Muffet, who was to be Bill’s guardian when Sue and Fleming went home to Jesus, was diagnosed with terminal cancer in 2006.
During one of several hospital visits to pray with her and prepare for a confident, peaceful, and positively anticipatory transition to eternal life by grace through faith in Jesus, Muffet asked if I would be Bill’s guardian after mom and dad joined her in heaven.
With the agreement of my wife and sons, I agreed.
Muffet went home to Jesus in early 2007 with Fleming joining her in 2011.
The relationship with Sue, Bill, and our family have deepened over time; sharing all holiday meals together; and as Sue has had increasing health challenges with the days left not being as many as those left, we have been preparing for the inevitable.
The obvious providence of God in this relationship has not been without a vocational disturbance.
Unlike some pastors and church staff members that abuse relationships for personal gain, I have had meetings with the Flott’s family lawyer and financial manager to make sure that there is no financial reward – like being named as a beneficiary in a will – for me. My only concern is a trust that will insure Bill continues to have his needs met and I can still provide for the rest of my family.
Another annoyance has been to hear of church members that were/are jealous of the time that I spend with Sue and Bill; which, lately, has been fed by some very sick and selfish former members to divide our family of faith because our leadership took the church away from them and gave it back to Jesus.
What really pisses me off is I have a notorious reputation for being available to anyone anywhere at any time with the only request that I be asked. Even the assassins know that’s true. They lie about this like other things because we don’t share the same Father.
I have never denied my time and whatever charismata entrusted to me that could be emotionally, intellectually, or spiritually helpful to anyone anywhere at any time unless counseled that the request is coming from someone that is irregular, irascible, insidious, and irreconcilable. Still, I will meet with such miscreants…with my wife and at least one or two elders.
Why am I telling you about this?
First, if you want time with your pastor, ask him for some time. If he is truly called to be a pastor, he will make time for you sooner than later. Don’t assume he knows your need if you have not asked him for time to tell him about it. You know what it means to assume.
Second, if your pastor is spending significant time with others, that doesn’t mean he cares any less for you. It just means, like Muffet to me, he’s been asked to help. If you haven’t asked for help, it’s not your pastor’s fault. Take a look in the mirror!
Now read Luke 11:5-13.